Jack likes it when his fingers magically find themselves in his mouth. It's not on purpose yet and I see the surprise in his eyes, followed by lots of sucking. In this picture, he looks like he's contemplating something...he routinely has a thoughtful look on his face. Sometimes, he looks quite serious...especially when he's first waking up or ready to eat.
I'm settling in a little. I'm not surprised anymore when I go into the nursery (Wow, there's a nursery in my house!) and there, sleeping or crying, is my little baby Jack. It felt like a dream for awhile but I've never heard of a dream lasting this long. I still tell myself sometimes....this is real! I'm wondering if my feelings of appreciation for this gift is average or above average from how other people feel. I'm not talking about love...I don't doubt every parent feels this fierce love inside...the kind that doesn't hesitate to step in front of a bullet that's headed for your child. I'm talking about the appreciation....the realization that this event....parenthood....could have easily not been in the cards for you. Then I tell myself...and all those of you out there who are still in the trenches or those of you who had the dreaded unplanned pregnancy...keep playing your cards, keep searching for your path on your journey....All our journey's are different and I suppose I don't have to compare myself to everyone else's level of appreciation. All I know is, I won't be taking this gift of baby Jack for granted.
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